ARTH 701 - CONTEMPORARY ART

Treating this page more of a blog than anything else. There will be a lot of writing done this quarter, which is not my strong suit. I’ll try my best nevertheless. I intend on this page being a discussion of my thoughts on contemporary art and will use it to strengthen my own work in subsequent quarters. There will be 5 photo shoots done this quarter that I will display here as well to advance my thesis and interests formed in “Starving Artist”,

PRE-CLASS ASSIGNMENT

 ·       What is your name and the name of the city and country where you live?

·       What is your pronoun?

·       Why is art important in today's world? 

·       What role does art play in our society?

·       What value is placed upon artists and their art, and why? 

Hello everyone! I am looking forward to learning and discussing art with you this quarter. My name is Philip Bonneau and I currently reside in Savannah, GA, which is where I grew up before moving away to Atlanta for 9 years and South Florida for 3. I originally went for my Bachelors in Graphic Design back at SCAD in 2005 and am now working on a Masters in Photography as a SCAD employee after 14 years in the industry. My pronouns are he/him.

Art has been an important link to every civilization in all its forms of communication and expression. The evolution of art from the beginning  has always been a tool to now brings forth discussions of a commonality between race, culture, and identity into the general connectivity of the human condition. Art brings about discussion. It is both realism and escapism. It is fiction and non-fiction. It can be subjective and objective. Art is capable of being as universal of a language as mathematics is when breaking it down to iconography, intent and purpose.

The visual has become the essential for the modern society when it comes to the everyday person. It can be seen with every social media account out there. We are becoming our own brands while dictating a personality. There is both editing and curation to a persona given regardless of the amount of reach obtained. Some profiles have more value than others but the intent is the same across the board. Through social media and visual communication, we are all becoming our own sovereign nation building our own rules and identity. The idea of what is art is being blurred further than when photography was introduced into modern art and challenged the painting. Everyone is becoming an artist in their own right. Perhaps it is all a performance, but regardless it has become a modern dialogue to be had as filters and choice of an image further blur the lines of what is art vs. expressionism. Is it both? Are we all trying to be (Con)Artists in reflection to what artists have done for centuries?

I look at the world today in two different ways when talking about art. I take into context with contemporary art that marketing is key to being successful. In the documentary, “The Price of Everything”, it is proven that modern art is also a capitalistic game to be played. Everyone is looking for something of meaning, but also looking at the resale value of it at the same time. I saw the prevalence of investment without fully understanding what you are buying into. But where I see contemporary art going is an ultimate exploration of self and existentialism. I may be naïve in that. This quarter will educate me further.

Artists have the weight to bear that their work will stand the test of time pre-modern era. What we, as a modern society, know of the world is solely based off of visual and written art. The rest of that is oral history and upbringing. But art has been the common denominator to history and it’s understanding. It is my theory that lines have been crossed in the digital age. Suddenly we are all curators and influencers to what stands the test of time in relevance which could directly challenge the position of modern art in the future. Is a meme a more successful piece of art if it is shared enough times? Is going viral a sense of making it as an artist even if your name is never known? Battle lines have been drawn on what is modern art. It is also a class war between what is physical and what is digital. Perhaps a super-hero on a toilet will last longer a presence in vernacular to come than a painter who shows their work at the corner gallery. In the end, marketing is going to be the key to success in the modern world.   

Spring Quarter Blog post 1: 3/22/2021

I would like to mark myself safe from the first day of Spring quarter in Savannah.

First off, what a day it was today.

I am taking Contemporary Art this quarter. The class I am enrolled in is a hybrid between in-person and online. It absolutely was stated by the professor today that it is not a lecture class, but is called a discussion class. Participation is required which rules out the option of not attending the live sessions from 8-1030 MW. I'm thankful that this has only caused a 30 minute disruption to my full-time position which has been super accommodating to this. If they were not, it would result in adding about 3.5-4 hours to the back-end of my day on top of readings to do and I'd miss out on the interactiveness trying to play catch up with extra work from not being a part of the live sessions. I feel like I'm getting too old for 1 or 2 am end of days but I am sure those days are still in me somewhere. It seems the virtual classes are unique to each professor which is different from the "Online" classes I have been taking that was more of a guided self-study than anything else. I'm curious of this being the closest I've gotten to in traditional education standards for me. Everyone is required to be on zoom regardless of being in class or virtual.

With everyone being on zoom made for some interesting moments where it was discovered that synchronizing of microphones are very important moving forward. We broke off into smaller groups at some point which became troublesome as I heard everyone else speaking in their groups as well as trying to speak in my own. I got bonus points for being the group speaker for my group where I had to talk about what is a contemporary artist in the relationship of the 6 roles of contemporary art that we learned about today. 1. The Artist, 2. Curators 3. Critics (and their dwindling importance from past art movements) 4. Museums 5. Dealers 6. Collectors. It's crazy to think that there was such a power shift between the critic and the buyer when it comes to contemporary art. Art is treated like the stock market now and I am absolutely curious when and if NFTs become a talking point since those are so new at the forefront.

I only have 2 grades this quarter. Class participation is 60% of the grade, a research paper is 40% of the grade. That's it. That's all she wrote. I imagine I'll put pressure on myself more so than others to keep things in order. But first, I have to come up with a research question by Wednesday. I want to stay in the realm of contemporary photography because I feel that will ultimately better suit my thesis when it is time. Do I write another paper on LaChapelle? I could, but probably not advised for growth. Do I find a contemporary artist focused on food? I am not sure of any in particular noteworthy enough to find books on for research. Perhaps it will come to me in my next post. I have a day to figure out what would be most beneficial to research since everything ultimately becomes double duty towards my thesis. Any suggestions?

Other than that, students are definitely back in the Savannah area. At work today we did business usually reserved for the weekend. Its March so tourist season has officially begun. But it is nice to see students added back to the mix. Savannah downtown is more international than you would think during this time of year and will only progress more until the Summer when people realize it is hot and humid here during that time.

But nevertheless, I have decided that my website page for my contemporary art class will be a blog made twice a week to fall in line with the classes taken. I find it important to share what I learn as I learn, but to also document my own journey as a contemporary artist merging the bad English writing I do with a little bit more self discovery/self actualization of what that means to me and how it relates to my work. It is personal, but on in the context of study and building towards the end of such towards my MFA or MA. Which one is to be determined based on as long as I am entertained and nurtured towards either. When contemporary art is all about a market system and value, one must wonder which degree is more important in the scheme of things. I want to be able to have the choice to be a teacher in future ventures, but I also want to be a successful contemporary artist. Do the 2 meet somewhere in the middle? TBD.

Spring Quarter Blog post 2: 3/23/2021

So I think I am going to stick with Zanele Muholi for my research paper this quarter. I need to come up with a question that needs to be answered though from it. My interest is in in Zanele being a queer artist and created almost a documentary approach to signifying LGBTQ+ communities in Africa, but I am drawn the most to the self portraits as a loud statement of who Zanele is as they goes through each and every session. There is power in reclaiming your own translation through self-portraiture by choosing how you are perceived with intent and purpose. I originally was looking up Richard Avedon to write about when he said (paraphrased) "The artist is always just photographing themselves." but I found he actually was pretty private and didn't share much written wise.

But I have to come up with a question to be answered in the context of Zanele's work. I question this as I set myself up for a self-portrait next week. Does the artist's perspective of self matter to the viewer? Does it add insight or is it a performance? Does how we choose to portray ourselves to the world make a difference in unifying marginalization?

Perhaps the question for my paper should be, "what does using the self as the subject matter do to enhance or distract from the conversations on identity and societal placement?"

Brainstorming, but I have until midnight tomorrow to come up with a question to ask Zanele Muholi on her work. Any help is welcomed.(8-10 double pages)

I’ve come up with the following Research Question and will be exploring the following references as they pertain to my paper.

How might Judith Butler understand Zanele Muholi as performing their gender and indeed their very self in the series Somnyama Ngonyama (Hail the Dark Lioness)?

Theory

Butler, Judith P. Gender Trouble: Feminism and the Subversion of Identity. New York: Routledge, 1990.

(Who is she) (Summarizing main ideas)

Primary Sources

Muholi, Zanele, and Lesley A. Martin. Somnyama Ngonyama Hail the Dark Lioness. New York, N.Y: Aperture, 2018.

Muholi, Zanele, and Sophie Perryer. Zanele Muholi: Only Half the Picture. Cape Town: Michael Stevenson, 2006.

“Zanele Muholi.” Art21. Accessed March 31, 2021. https://art21.org/artist/zanele-muholi/?gclid=CjwKCAjwu5CDBhB9EiwA0w6sLcL6cgfUOvRjcPWiIDcsHBys7eh3l8U-4n0K9GmCP94Ggre8dIpMHBoCp50QAvD_BwE.

(Artist Interviews) (Art Critics)

Secondary Sources

Baderoon, Gabeba. ""Gender within Gender": Zanele Muholi's Images of Trans Being and Becoming." Feminist Studies 37, no. 2 (2011): 390-416. Accessed March 30, 2021. http://www.jstor.org/stable/23069910.

 Raél Jero Salley; Zanele Muholi's Elements of Survival. African Arts 2012; 45 (4): 58–69. doi: https://0-doi-org.library.scad.edu/10.1162/AFAR_a_00028

 Makhubu, Nomusa M. September 01, 2012. Violence and the cultural logics of pain: representations of sexuality in the work of Nicholas Hlobo and Zanele Muholi. Critical arts 26, no. 4, (accessed March 23, 2021).

(Reads Primary Sources and Interpret it) (Gives Broader sense of subject) (Peer Reviewed Sources)

 (4 days to read resources)

April 7 – Peer Review of Outline

Spring Quarter Blog post 3: 3/24/2021

Been actually talking about my selected artist with my mom this evening. She took the time last night on her own accord to discover everything she could about them until she fell asleep because she wanted to talk about it and never really looked up an artist before. My mom lightened up when i told her i actually reached out to the artist on Facebook saying i was writing a paper on them and wanted to ask questions when i was more well versed in what to ask. I'm focusing on the artists self portraits in particular but the one about their mother is the one id chose to write about if i could only choose one. It's going to be these memories with my mother that i remember the most and i love that she is probably more excited to learn from this class than i am. #ilovemymom

 Spring Quarter Blog post 4: 3/29/2021

One of the things I want to do this quarter is to continue to photograph as I learn more about contemporary art. I want to see where my eye changes in particular to the exploration of self through my chosen artists to research on this quarter. I feel there is more than enough time to be able to execute 1 shoot every other week during this quarter but perhaps that is ambitious at this point since I now no longer have a day off to myself. I can see that being draining over time, but I find it important and necessary to be an active part of the discussion vs. a passive presence after hours. With work I just can’t see myself being able to sustain not being a part of a class. Most of all I find myself wanting to be there as ideas formulate through every discussion taken. From established artists to theorist, it is all present to present your own ideas in time. Time is always the key factor to understanding.

For my first shoot I am taking a page from my own book to remember what I'm photographing as it relates to me. A single page does not tell a full story but we curate things down to what we perceive to be good intentions and humility. For me the execution of the Walrus was both daunting in it’s relationship to myself but also to break through the barriers of what the original intent was vs. where I see it now in retrospective. My initial select is above. This image falls in line with Brave New Secrets but echoes into Starving Artist as well artistically. I've thought long and hard about my interpretation of this character and I can’t help but to feel like it is another almost there attempt. The “Middle of the Night” is present with the flash on one side, darkness on the other. Not the photoshopped half-day/night I originally envisioned, but its a subtle nod to it even if it does come off as distracting a bit to my eye at first. Harsh lights and harsh blacks….stuck in the middle of both I presume. 8 years apart from my test shot and I figure out that this character was meant to be clothed and sophisticated. The Walrus isn’t necessarily a liar, but he is guarded. He is secretive towards what he hides through symbols and may or may not be ready to reveal them.

The Masked shot is definitely my chosen image for "The Walrus" but I do like this one as well. In processing this image it speaks to me to where I feel I need to explain myself on intention. But in doing so would also strictly prove a point that I've always looked to be understood and try to explain if only asked. Probably why I wrote a book to try to explain myself where even in that book I don't answer the questions I am afraid of asking myself. I do try to come to a conclusion though. I've tried. I feel like I've had to explain myself my entire life if only to find a purpose for myself somewhere hidden in there. Sometimes I'm not vocal enough. Sometimes I'm not passionate enough. Sometimes I let people walk over me. Sometimes I can't fucking see why things are the way they are. Other times I simply don't have what it takes to say what needs to be said. Each memory of that becomes a collected oyster sucked up and devoured for everything it is worth to discover meaning and intent later in life. Some of those oysters are eaten without taking the time to fully understand their value. Others are sucked dry to the point of nothing left. A collection gets made move time. A pile builds. There is a continuation to shuck the oysters given, devouring everything you can for a sense of purpose and understanding. But at what cost? How many lives are taken in your own search for identity and purpose? Consume. Consume. Consume. As you wear your war masks, what are you hiding underneath? What are you doing my love?

Brave New Secrets is dangerous for me. I know that now as it does exactly what it is supposed to do and reflect back on yourself and what you have done. It's what I anticipated my thesis to be about with the unlikeliness that I'll walk away from it in Heaven finding truth in honesty, retribution in mistakes and life after wrongs. Even this setting itself is a reminder of when I made a promise to one person and broke that promise in the journey of my own identity and purpose. Everything is about growth as the shells collect.

What does the Walrus represent was asked of me during the shoot. I look back at my notes of what I published and found it to be true that I'd hide the tattoos as they complicate an image and invite narrative that could convolute. Once thought to be naked, I felt it appropriate to refer to the text and illustrations to wear what I have become ill-accustomed with wearing these days. For the Carpenter, I was to be naked and have that shot as well. Everything is laid bare to see. The two exist as one.

The walrus is the price paid for overthinking and through actions of protectionism of self. It's how you manage PTSD when you simply know what happened, decided to survive in some cases and accepting that there were moments when you didn't want to anymore in others. You acted on that. U survived. That act defines. That act remains either silent or at the forefront. It was the artist intent to photograph this at my lowest physically. Sick. Unhealthy. A pestilence inside to remind me of the rotten intent that holding onto things does to one person. The Walrus can kill you if you let it.

The Walrus is dead. It served its purpose. No reason to play that character ever again. Time to heal. #walrusunmasked

I find it interesting that people on social media connected more than this image than the one masked. Was it the words that transformed the picture or does one speak more of identity vs. the other. Both are valid attempts, but perhaps the combination of word and visual makes a difference.

Spring Quarter Blog post 5: 3/31/2021

 His works are heavily based on mythology, literature and history. The past is important to him as he finds artists must take risks and assume responsibilities to both art and history such as this sculpture of burnt books again brought upon by memories of WWII and on answering questions of “cultural identity”. “The past is tabulated because to confront it would necessitate denial and disgust”. This quote rings true in this work as not a direct confrontation to heritage, but finds it important to human history to remember what “human culture” is capable of doing.

Keifer views the meaning of art to be very fluid. “Is it the work that defines itself or is it those that write about it that do that?” Art in general is comprehended in a single glance. The Literature on art is what becomes fluid.

Keifer states at the end of the writing that I had to discuss today that “Until the artist is dead, we are not able to determine his work in all its dimension.” What do you think he meant about that in regards to identity and self? I find it such an odd question from an artist that speaks of fluidity of history. Can there be a finite answer to things once an artist is no longer able to produce works? Are we bound to the words of those that only discuss art or should we take into account the general glance to comprehend what is presented to us?

I find the deeper I go into this class (and my online blog recording this) that my focus is becoming strictly on the identity questions being risen. Whether it be Identity of self or Identity of culture. The influence of culture on identity is present. Whether in my Muhuli’s case of being LGBTQ+ in South Africa, Keifer being a German, or me being a gay man from the South of the United States. What I produce is being influenced on a search for identity and purpose. It always has been. I question my “Starving Artist” series a little more at this point now 2 weeks into Contemporary Art. I have no doubt I will question it more as I proceed. I have a feeling the more I delve into Muhuli’s work I’ll have a better understanding of where to go when working with what you have, but I have to ask myself am I still talking about identity in that series. I’m talking about struggles. I’m talking about wasting something that is necessary for survival to make ends meet. Am I throwing that in people’s faces that are actually struggling by wasting food for the sake of art? To me food is no different a mask than a superhero or a helmet in the way I’ve presented it. It is a prop capable of being transformed into whatever it is supposed to be. It’s an alternative material to relay emotion and evoking feeling. But I guess there is truth to my reservations as well. First glance and second glances change perspectives. Today I was floored looking up the price of oysters as I tentatively placed images in the rotation of my starving artist. $99 for a 100 online is what I found. I would not have had the chance to do my Oyster shoot if not for the charity of a local charity doing an oyster roast anyways. I feel privileged to be able to create an image I never would have been able to afford if it wasn’t for the charity of me asking, “let me take your trash”. Trash became transformed to be a metaphor that meant something to me personally but also still speaks about the context of value and working with what you have. I know far greater artists have worked with less and I need to come up with a better talking point than just that. But what becomes the most expensive shoot in that series, does become a talking point when literature of the piece becomes involved. There is creativity to the series, but would you buy it and say it was important? It was important to me. But I don’t think the message is translating yet in Starving Artist. The story can’t be faking it until you make it nor dumpster dive to present a particular image you want the world to see you as. But then again…maybe it is. Maybe my questions are generational. I can’t help but think as I work harder for less that perhaps there is something said of that notion. Until then…identity is at the forefront. Whether through Brave New Secrets or Starving Artist…tthat is the subject of just one burnt book to the next.

Spring Quarter Blog post 6: 4/3/2021

Work is done and now getting ready to have a zoom meeting with a classmate in India for our presentation on Monday. I'll then spend the rest of the evening doing my part of the presentation and will reconvene with each other tomorrow again to pull it all together. It seems crazy to think things like that are possible to connect worlds apart and interested in seeing how cultural perspective plays a part in our presentation.

Entering week 3 of 10 for school this week and its been a challenge adjusting to a proper work/school/life balance but making it work. Although I do have to find a balance to sit down and read and really comprehend what I am taking in. The class is set-up as more of a discussion point process. Each week we are either assigned a contemporary artist or are part of a "theory panel" where we break down some of the most influential theorists of modern society. All of this is learned and discussed why working on our own research papers that are to be a precursor to what would be our thesis paper.

Yesterday I presented the question to the world, what is identity? I received answers that point to fluidity in general but also in relationship to the world around oneself; conditional standards and commitments to ideologies that evolve through learned exploration. It's an idea that is different for everyone and yet somehow universal in its approach of creation from an extension of others. It is through loss and it is through gain. It is an amorphous state of being relational to the world you have a sense of belonging to. It can also be a lie. It can be a performance from one group to the next. Again it is suggested that it is fluid and ever changing. Perhaps this is what Keifer meant that "only an artist could be understood after their death". The fluidity of identity is no longer flowing. The river dried up and there is only the remembrance that there once was a river there. That thought segues in the theories of Michael Foucault which is what my presentation is on this week.

I'm not prepared to do a deep-dive into his theories. I'll save that for my next post after the presentation. Everything is fluid. What I liked about Foucault is his notions on history and it being something that is generally biased if not taking into account personal accounts to create a more fluid understanding of what could be considered historic. Is it not the same when asking yourself a question of, "Who Are U?" You are equal points self-realization and social-perception. In the end the story written is either by your own hand or by others accounts. Neither one is to be considered absolutely true, but I believe that it is somewhere between in the grey is the answer. You have to look at both in order to understand. But how does that notion work when you feel that others might not understand. It is not up to any one person or group of people to understand oneself but that brings up questions of uniqueness and individuality. Both can be attributed to any individual. Through a series of events unique to an individual only, lessons of learned behavior is either rewarded or punished. This can be on both a personal or social level. Referring back to Foucault, there is both power majority and resistance to it. Both come into play in what is to become of both history, but what I theorize personal identity.

To answer my own question on identity, as I understand it now at this point of my research, is that perception and memory are constantly at play. Memories of behavior and their reactions. How we feel about those actions both now and then invite change or a repeat in behavior to complete patterns becoming formed. Those patterns in time become something that cannot be intrinsicly broken apart from an individual and are capable of being accepted/rejected by an individual but noted by outside resources. (I'm questioning that notion at the moment of if this is the foundation for addictive personalities in general), Nevertheless, I agree the identity is fluid and capable of change. Perhaps it saddens me that its always evolving until we die. Then we are left for others to depict us and remember us through their own experiences and not what is ever considered "a truth"

Spring Quarter Blog post 7: 4/5/2021

First Theorist Panel completed. We ran a bit over so will finish it on Wednesday since we anticipated 30 minutes and got 20. Take-away from the study on Foucault is that the interpretation of history is fluid and open to interpretation through a collection of personal experiences in order to find a "truth" and also determined by those in "power" at the time. Power dictates perceived truth towards what is considered best for society. As noted in my question on Hitler, not always does power and perception get it right on what is best for bio-politics. This also applies to church being the power of morality and thinking far before that. I leave my discussion of Foucault with this image I found of him talking about photography. Mirrors factor heavily in my book and what I want for Brave New Secrets, if not portraying this exact same occurrence as a reference of placement and of choice but done in a way that it could never be recreated again outside of the experience of it in the installation. Was interesting to find that he too made a connection on the matter.

"French philosopher Michel Foucault says that photographs form spaces called heterotopia, a concept he uses to describe places and spaces that function as something new, a unique space which is neither here nor there, simultaneously both physical and mental, spaces that have more layers of meaning or relationships to other places than immediately meet the eye." 

The question was brought up when discussing an artist today in class, "Is it ok to use other people's pain as a the subject matter for artistic work? Why or Why not? This was asked in context of a White South African artist showcasing the horrors of the apartheid from the perspective of black africans.

I just went on a 5 minute discussion where I was talking about Spielberg directing Schindler's List while my professor mentioned the example of him also directing "The Color Purple". From one sense he has a cultural connection to one film and in the other he has to search for empathy from a place of privilege and power. (He toned down the LBGTQ+ aspects of it, but that is another story).

Professor chimed in and talked about how cinema is about 10-15 years ahead of contemporary art in its progression since it has been consumed on a mass-market scale for so long where contemporary art is just becoming a global market relatively. Interesting to think about.

Spring Quarter Blog post 8: 4/25/2021

Self-admittedly, I’ve lost track of this blog. Started off good, but derailed a bit due to unforeseen events in time management and auto accidents on my part. Next few posts will be more of a pick up of pace and back to normal from here on out. It is important to me as I go through this class that I absorb everything as it is changing the way I think about everything in the context of a thesis. I wrote this on 4/14/2021

From my own experience, Life is a ballet done in the rain. A dance learned overtime. The potential to slip and fall is ever present, but there is beauty in learning the movements that flow with the environment vs. trying to have the environment adapt to you.

I’ve fleshed that thought out a bit over the last couple days. I put the words below into a file called, “Chasing Jabberwocks”. I think that is the name of my thesis to come. I’ve been writing elsewhere in something simply called “Fragmented Thoughts” and utilizing that space for internal and personal reflection and documentation of my day to day and thought process. Never to be shown the light of day, but somewhere betwewen the two rests the middle of the night where there is overlap and artistic license takes over.

Below is what I consider to be my Introduction to “Chasing Jabberwocks” (Work-in-progress).

From my own experience, I can only describe life as a ballet done in the rain.

It is a dance learned over time that is completely impossible to master to perfection as there is no such thing of it outside of an idea created internally. You can strive for it. You will grasp for it. Everyone’s idea of perfection is like trying to imagine Heaven. The song changes for everyone. Accept that truth now in the beginning. It is important as I dance my song to you. 

There is always going to be the potential slip and fall that will occur.

Its natural. Do not beat yourself up it.

All I can say is practice in knowing your surroundings. To give a metaphor, “Most of life will be about understanding the rain and how it relates to you in the matter of the dance you were meant to perform”. Growth will come in time the longer you become aware of your surroundings. Sometimes that comes by just listening to what is being presented to you as truth during a rain storm. In others; a need to validate your existance in according to water as it falls. Accept the rain as a truth wanting to be understood just as much as you do. 

Breathe.

Remain Silent.

Listen. 

If you are to dance in the rain, precision will come from knowing the environment and acting in confidence of that. Be bold in every move you make after your intitial understandings of it. Its an unspoken treaty between the two being made. Be brave to take a chance as full comprehension only comes in time. Learn each other and learn each other well. Learn compassion for one another. Your lives are finite and definitive. Challenge the rain’s adaptability only after you have accepted and understood its existance as truth for it is doing the same to you. Failure to do so would result in an incompatible match at the time. You will slip. You will fall. That is not a challenge towards your need for existance against the rain but a hesitation on if you question their worth. You exist. The rain exists. Don’t combat that truth. Show each other how much you should exist as one or against each other. There is fluidity of the relationship to be had. Dance is meant to be both symbiotic and/or a counter to your partner. Its ultimately about the story you agree upon telling that matters. Be confident in the story chosen for this is your dance to be had. 

How you react to your environment is important. Do not fight the rain entirely. It will tell you its truth as you try to convey yours. The rain listens. It reacts. Maturity comes in time from the experience of reactions made prior. You are learning to work together. Start with your own relationship with the rain and build from there. Every angle of the body molds in either recoil or acceptance in a fluid motion equivilant to your liquid surroundings. Accept that the rain will transform you. You will begin warm, loosely clothed and confident in clothing.

The rain will cling to you. It will bear your skin present and reveal you for what you are hiding underneath. It does not weigh you down, but simply wants to release you from your own insecurities to be closer to your true self.  You have to understand the rain in order to understand how to adapt to it as being a part of you. Rain is the result of too much moisture filled up in the sky until the heavens cannot contain it anymore. It is released when it can no longer be contained or withheld. Much like holding in emotions, the sky falls and a natural dance occurs. I expect you to understand that one day about yourself. The rain is trying to set you free and give you life. It’s telling you it is ok to let go. That is its only purpose. It rains because emotion is not meant to be held in for so long. Let it drip down your face like the tears once held back and release your own in the disquise of nature’s mask.  

Dance is like that. Symbiotic of the environment and total external expression without words to back up meaning. You simply have your own body to express what you feel. I’ve always admired the beauty of dance. When there are no words, there are a thousand being unspoken at once. A single dance is no different than a rain drop. A performance captured or forgotten but present nevertheless. Are you confident or are you scared that your existance could mean nothing in the end? But remember that the result of a rain drop falling to the floor leaves more than just an unnoticed ripple. It’s a drumbeat that echos the moment it touches a surface. Inaudible to us, but its presence remains factoring things on even the smallest of levels to make the biggest differences. That beat resonates with every other droplet trying to echo its existance into the world only to be forgotten and never thought of again. Don’t be forgotten. Don’t forget the rain. Be decisive in your movements. Be comfortable. You are trying to justify yourself in the existance of rain and it would in vain if only you were to listen to it as a soundbeat to something bigger than either you or I. There is beauty in learning the movements that flow with the environment vs. trying to have the environment adapt to you. There is a balance to things that should be understood. You exist. They exist. We exist.  

You won’t understand this dance right away. One day you will. Its been one of my bucket-list items to dance in the rain with someone, yet I must take my own advice and dance at least once on my own without restriction or chance of critique. To understand it and to identify a freedom inside me that perhaps I only imagine is there. Perhaps if I considered my life a ballet in the rain, I’d look at the Devil Inside for inspiration to start off a narrative and go from there. It neither begins nor ends there, but when it comes around, there is no room for slip or fall. There is already experience and acceptance of environment. It is about the relationship of internal issues as it relates to oneself and to others. A tango in the rain. Just one. Then two. Then multiple partners leading to them with multiple partners and so on and so on. All similar in their mirrored masks. As if they are all just a reflection of themselves. Perhaps a thought in vain. Perhaps they missed the point. Take off the mask. 

We are all in this together. 

Maybe this is the beginning of something different or maybe it is just a fragmented thought, but it is a start to think about things from a place of beauty instead of a place of displacement. I would love to know your thoughts on it. This is the only thing from that series of thoughts that I’ll be posting, but I am using it to segue into what it is supposed to be.

Spring Quarter Blog post 9: 4/28/2021

The presentation exists, but there comes a point I let the artist herself use her own words as if should be in the context of Carrie Mae Weems. She talks of appropriation and the influence of everything in an artist’s perspective and purpose. It is unescapable to not draw from one another, but it how you go about it that can be smiled or frowned upon based on the application. Perhaps I’ll modify without her words and simply a link in it’s place, but it never would do justice towards the original intention nor have the same effect of my basic introduction.

Spring Quarter Blog post 10: 4/28/2021

As I wrote nothing underneath this section before, I find the image now accurate to the way things unfold. A man presented of much words, written, expressed and compartmentalized into diaries, book forms and audio tapes. The artist speaks and chooses not to at the same time. From society of then to the society now where oversharing can occur, yet in doing so brings forth humanity into the picture from the inevitable intimacy of words express in candor.

As I related and at this time had already published ‘Building Brave New Secrets’, ‘Curated Jellyfish’ ‘The companion of Ugly Simple Truths’ art book and art book to retain, collect, curate and express in artistic intention, I realize the problematic aspect of David where at what point do you take what was produced and organize it in ways that become definitive. Or is The whole collection left for others to edit, process and find narratives. As I’ve been sown shut in some ways, it has been the desire based on modern digital warfare present to compartmentalize, organize, express while moving on at the same time seeking for value and retainment that never comes from the constant absorption of it nevertheless. ‘In stolen words leads to wooden answers of what was really behind them to begin with.’

Spring Quarter Blog post 11: 5/4/2021

So estatic to find this lost project from college. I seriously thought this would never be seen again. This represents so much of who I am as a person at such an early age. In it I explore photography for the first time. I explore personal writing for the first time. I explore so much of what I've forgotten most of my life has been on either expanding on these thoughts or coming to terms with new ones as I age. Enjoy 20-21 year old Pip. Way wiser than he should be at that age, but definitely this is the primer to anything I've ever written after and will write. This is Alice's Adventures Underground.

I'm very happy to have found this for my own accord. Now time to work on my research paper. It will be an all-nighter and I plan on going to bed sometime around 10-11pm tomorrow.

I think what i like most is i remembered my identity and that i always speak from a place of honesty. I've forgotten my identity and that it didn't come from one person or many. I've always been me.

Night loves.