I write this knowing I did not activate my Starving Artist page and I don’t even want to read it to see where the changes laid. Message was in the right direction and as things spun one way or another I defer to Feb. 15th when my Facebook was attacked and deleted content that came back. A fight on one side or the other knowing what is at stake and what has happened for years. I thought my personally owned website was a safe ground and due to international law, it is a last fort standing that cannot ever be touched without my permission in any way shape or form. I will not touch whatever was on Starving Artist knowing every version is there somewhere and I know my words. I do not take responsibility of other people’s disregard to privilege. I have the right to counter anything on there that I don’t agree with and I stood for hours talking and reading up unto number 13 knowing bits and pieces after were placed and worked out in the world that we do not always understand what is present and active in our lives. That lack of restraint from whomever did that was the cause for me to say “Chasing Jabberwocks” never hit the internet nor shared with others and “Curated Jellyfish: A Paradise Lost” was acted on without compensation to myself. I do not modify my blogs at all and I live type this page to prevent those who already apparently had access and could get past firewalls.

I’ve asked to #tidyup and reported. It has been rape. It has gone on beyond rape. Rape of creative stories. Rape of body. Rape of privacy. Rape of personal information. Tried publicly in areas that never to stand trial and raped in the disregard of others putting themselves and their own insecurities over other human life. I defer to my “A Golden Rulebook” knowing it is copywritten in photographic and written form. To erase someone’s digital presence is a major crime to humanity knowing we last digitally longer than we do in life. Our stories told by those of influence or those of connection. I caution anyone knowing that damage has been done and those stories are verbal at this point. I do not know that industry but I do ask publicly as I have before. Please stay off my website and social media knowing it is documented elsewhere at this point. Those who had a time thumbing their nose and allowing that, I cannot speak on behalf of people who thought that was ok to sign off on. I’ve created more than enough legal avenues for people to explore that desire.

I speak from experience. This is something I have to bear knowing I speak for The brides in my history. I speak for the dreamers. I speak for the artists trying to make it. I speak for decency and I speak knowing due to unnecessary privilege I cannot be looked at in the eye again due to what never should have been happening and reported properly. Money choices of others were made when I contracted with Diablo. Slamming of keyboards should had been the end of that. November 2nd, 2018 should have been the end of that. Money was put ahead of human life and somehow I was continually raped afterwards as I continued to branch out into new worlds and evolved thoughts to help others while trying to regain my life and push forward. The constant take of my life is well understood knowing my story is generations had just with the Heroes+VIllains alone before finding out I love psychology and dug deep into “A Divine Comedy” and motive on why things are placed the way they are. It is always about perspective and placement. Starving Artist was birthed from my life experience and notice of others knowing it was sound and from my generation and could be explored further. I question considering who thought they had ownership of my works?! I work well with others. Who has been following this?

I’ve tackled many things in my life and still try to help others. Look far enough and you will find answers but that all changes when you hear your life ripped apart in real-time, life-time office environment which I guess they tried to write a book on the art of bullying and failed miserably at it knowing they did not know me and just kept at it. Our histories prior are very different and I always pleaded or offered conversation or dialog. No manipulation until I needed to test what it means to fight against privacy breaches and what was going on. Those statements come with facts.

I’ve seen my files on other sites manipulated, changed and deleted. This page is just as protected as any other website in the international world. You cannot touch it in any circumstance in any lesson you want to teach. It has been a known fact and artistic expression of going onto the backend and log-in aspect is absolutely forbidden. There are rules and laws and there is no excuse for trying to erase my history past, present or future.

I’ve been a product of working with what I have and building from there. Friendship and getting to know people. Built communities and tried to bridge others. Poverty in what I should have been making and stories where now I don’t own a home. Never did and never will as others wait for my money to run out to validate them taking what they have already taken from me banking on a suicide attempt that frankly the one 3 years ago was enough to know that people continue after and those are loved are never safe. That just isn’t going to happen.

For the last 3 years I tried to pick myself back up and tried to go back to get a Masters in Photography. Discounted in my experience professionally, it was a safe space to try to prepare others for the world knowing what I experienced in a corporate front on exploitation. As I tried to dream and work myself back to center in the basement of The Scottish Rite where I worked also in my undergrad, the way we treat one another hit the forefront again in legality. I did what needed to be done and reported to HR and later compliance. That was over a year ago at SCAD and that should had ended there. It was never a game and I took my education very seriously. One in their late 30’s after my experience does not simply settle for $15.95 an hour while schooling both my supervisor and HR on the laws of breaks and understanding the aspects of exploitation and privacy rights as a member of the SEA (Student.Employee.Alumni) to the Savannah College of Art and Design. Since 2001, I have been and always will be a bee. That degree is not going anywhere.

I grew up in Savannah since 1989. A snow storm then that started right outside of a dine-in Pizza Hut. Very rare. We had just moved from Puerto Rico right before Hugo hit. I grew up in the arts and I hope the majority of what I wrote in starving artist remained. At least the beginning aspect. I enrolled at SCAD under “18 and on your own conditions” and help from strangers. Graphic design at Poetter Hall and worked at the Gryphon across the street full-time with a class benefit that has sense been changed tax-wise. I grew up on the Bull St. and I spent my time there trying to branch from painting to art history appreciation to a job that went to touching international brands to being a senior aspect to the sanctity of marriage knowing during my undergrad I was engaged once and stories of futures that ended privately that affected my life and my life’s work. “A Father of the Bride” where my works in the Divine dealt with that issue and others and branched from there. Struggled in attics uninsulated and bounced from place-to-place doing what I had to do to survive and build a better life for my own.

I built a brand for myself with the great help of others and gave it up to help fulfill other dreams and Disney connections. That story is one of where people chose money over emotion. It has been that prior and will be that after unless things change. When all was lost and I went to 0 dollars, it was the safe space of 20 years connections giving recommendations of how to rebuild before things changed in April 2021. Locked in the basement, my Manderella persona already impeded on took over. You look for anything when attacked digitally or any other realm. You grasp and at least with me I had 100s of archetypes and references to fall back on hoping I could survive. I know what I’ve written prior on here and what is handwritten of dreams and aspirations but deemed never enough while I sat and watched things of mine play out elsewhere. Especially with the upcoming innovation aspect of things.

When I saw a position for the director of SCADpro and SCAD Art Sales, I wrote what I wrote in my “Open Letter to The United Nations” knowing I have a printed copy and they have theirs knowing I’d never modify it on my website and that is now called into question. Exploitation was occurring where students were paying to have their legacies taken away before they even hit the workforce. A Bull of Bull St. built on that and allowed that knowing copyright/trademark/patents are always to be a priority of the creator’s rights before venturing into the real world. Even when I applied as a student to SCADpro, I was met with hostility and disregard by a representative of the program. I saved that for my interview that I had that was epic within itself and a fantastic memory. I tried to get in to fundamentally changing the school for the betterment of the students and college knowing their was so much expansion to be had while they continued to compound positions together. At the forefront I saw zero reason for students to ever pay for a SCADpro positions while others made millions off their ideas while paying for the experience. A giant mishandling of intellectual properties from around the globe. Those students and alumni are owed their share of their contributions.

I stood across the street at Art’s Cafe in discovery in the solitude of others not paying the extra 7.25 an hour for an extra hand or two. Multiple positions held by one knowing they neglected their April 2021 obligations of compliance and compassion. I cited historic preservation required of the building as I found things I cannot explain on the floors and in undeveloped hidden aspects of the basements. Artwork that was shown to some and unchallenged that something here matters more and is important. The events leading up to my termination where retaliatory on their part and I can only imagine if my education side and stances factored in as I refused to provide layered files and high resolution to my online learning courses. There was no need for it and I started approaching student rights 2 quarters ago knowing I had to take a quarter off to compose myself from the April 2021 and the resignation of the general manager. You do what you have to do for others.

That building. I grew up there. Walked up and down steps knowing the flashback history of my own and even shot my “Walrus” image there which was also attacked. Everything attacked and everything real. No excuse for it and completely preventable. Loved getting to know the students and treated them as peers knowing they represent what I represent and I learned of all cultures during that time. Respect always given and cited laws and “Boundaries: When to say YES When to say NO To take Control of Your Life”. A gift given years prior when I lived in Atlanta the first time.

I haven’t set foot in The Scottish Rite since Feb.10, 2022 when I removed myself from a hostile work environment and reported it accurately. I was retaliated against instantly the day of and have 4 verified documented responses for dismissal while also an attempt to sign an agreement for my owed vacation pay that should always be paid out when job ends regardless of reason. The contract was instantly rebuttals and from the first paragraph they attempted to lock a way for me to never sue the college or any of my heirs or family. Having not known the full aspect of what has happened with my life’s work, I remember “These walls are Thin” during my compliance meeting knowing I was hearing people converse and talk about my responses to retaliation after my repeated requests to transfer.

Unemployed now not from my own accord. I see and have documented the manipulation they were trying to do knowing even Curated was written prior to being a student. Anything regarding my works with SCAD was of no benefit towards myself and no awareness of that being shared. I have awareness of what should had been stopped at least 3 years ago and tests of strength to keep on knowing that it has compounded into areas of riddles, and elsewhere.

My sense of strength comes from what I saw happen to brides years ago. My sense of protection comes from trying to raise my brother and mother knowing no student should ever have to struggle the way I have nor should they be exploited the way I have. Slept in cars to save time going home, education was important and I always challenged it. All I have left knowing all my files have been compromised of visual and written and history stances…all I can do is try to protect others. I went to Paris for Thanksgiving and called it St. Patrick’s Day since it was not celebrated there. A shot in front of Lacaste knowing dreams gone that could have been had. Who bit me?

Yesterday I stood in the middle in reflection. Hopes and reality. Dreams vs. Reality. Struggle vs. Aspiration. A test of concept as I never could afford much of value. Versace shades bought on the way to Paris with a challenge to myself on how to ever approach photographing such a luxury item in my vain. A proof of concept that when one needs to stand tall that it is important to be reflective of either side. One side represents parent’s and donor gifts to succeed. The other side represents 18 and on your own and doing what you have to do to become successful. A unicorn story when you believe in the call of the bull to only find out what they were collecting.

So many unicorns held back from getting past the stigma of “Just an Art Degree”. Our nest eggs stolen before they even hatched and others cuckoo’led before they were allowed to thrive.

Perhaps the stone facade was something we all had to face. Protective of the students of SCAD knowing any of us can be erased and frozen, there is a golden mark in the middle of what is idealism. A crossroad combining cultures that clearly divides the two. Thoughts from New York Ave. and Paris. An “A” game knowing my heart was meant for New York if I could had afforded it, Chicago if I could had afforded it, Boston if I could had afforded it, California if I could had afforded it. So many things if I could had afforded it. But As fate would have it I was exactly where I was supposed to be knowing Artistic integrity and innovation never fails to always survive. My Italy trip is a secret but always check out Art’s Cafe at The Scottish Rite where SCAD threw me under the bus and into the basement of exploitation.

Imagine all the artists and what they could do knowing they get compensated for their work that they have already provided to companies everywhere. At the very least artistic respect should be had knowing you can’t make millions off people that are not compensated nor when they paid into the program. If anything they are shareholders now in some regards and I guarantee they have vested interest in keeping companies flourishing. It is in all of our Alumniati interest to keep any school open where we were exploited and to restructure accordingly to prevent further exploitation. Everyone has school pride and we should be allowed to have questions answered and not allow others to go unaccounted in “shark-tanking”. Any university is built by those who attended it and I am a true bee trying to fix a hive that has mishandled others and myself.

Whatever comes from this, a stance made knowing they even tried to deny my unemployment. The official response is on my Linkedin which I find to be an amazing tactic for others to adopt to check and balance cruelty within the workplace. It is a start.

From one starving artist to others,
At the very least I can tell you unicorns existed regardless of gender. If any one of them was wiped out, others know why. The rest of the story just happens naturally in selection? Foreign thoughts come together.

“a unicorn vs. The Bull on Bull St.: A SCAD Story.”
When out of work, don’t stop dreaming. The soul knows know to do.

Editor’s Note, Originally it was stated I moved to Savannah in 1987, that was incorrect and changed to 1989.