I Wrote this 6/24/2022
Thoughts if before where an idea came and went.
A hold out to write together.
“The Christmas Conundrum”.
Over the years I’ve heard attacks on Christmas where I pass by them year by year.
The thought of birthdays and what they represent…perhaps back to the gym before I continue.
6/25/2022
I decided to wait to give writing a break since mind was elsewhere on it and on the focus of the day before in interest that sparks memories and understanding.
I’ve grown up very fondly of Christmas knowing other holidays of equal importance and represent faiths or circumstance or not celebrated at all.
I remember sitting under the tree as a child looking up at the inner workings of lights, nature and ornaments to have depth perception while interested to see what was on the inside while others take things for face value. Never thought of it at the time but perhaps I was the present of eve and the rest the next day.
I got in the knack of picking up a box and having a pretty good idea of what it was. Always was creative in that regard and hidden adventures await each season that became a game of guessing and giving.
I remember when my parents divorced a second-hand tree was given (fished out of the dumpster other years) and the Santa statue from my childhood where once entered into the home, I started with notes and signs put up annually on his outstretched hands that was meant to hold a tray.
“I’ll Work For Food.” first before going to an honest letter in my teens on “Wanting my mother back…and to bring family together.”
The statue is somewhere around here at my mother’s (or is it anymore as I’m not playing the what has been Grinch’ed game with people who’s hearts are not in the right place). Perhaps it is near my boxes of books and never-ending stories.
As the years passed from there, the tree became a luxury item that often I either could not afford or question the size of the tree had. Eventually I adopted the habit of buy a mini live one rooted and perhaps plant it later.
The smell of a natural tree does bring back child memories and on occasion once or twice I had a tree up. Have not had a tree since 2016 and I’ve had many a time of Christmas prior to divorce and after where few moments spark between what relationships I have had and the ones I’ve had alone.
Wrapping presents mostly or getting to know people where obviously from 2017 Christmas, a challenge with often nothing to give either from being unemployed, down to zero or struggling in areas that make me wonder why anyone wanted to possibly attack me on Christmas’s.
I suppose if my birthday was a planned attack, I get it.
Disregarded and countered wondering why someone would even be allowed to continue in reacting capacity of professional…or was it personal to someone?
Both really as one invaded into the work place that was never a misunderstanding. Perhaps the inclusion of those personal attacks is no one I want in charge yet understand that the lesson learned is the cruelty of others can be outmatched by the hearts of many.
The idea of vices of which judgement is one way or another. A gift of the Maji where I question to myself, “Why would the one who creates an amazing Christmas gift idea be attacked on the holidays & birthdays?”
The season means many things for different people. To me, it changes year-to-year where I work with what I can or as things were last year,” Just one gift.” Was it discounted?
Perhaps over time Christmas has evolved for me as it does in any holiday. I imagine each holiday is there for a reason and represents something to look forward to and plan in group moments of breaking the everyday life and plan accordingly for either self, intimacy, family or others.
A spirit of comradery & connection. I understand why people hate certain holidays.
Was my assets to be treated like boxed presents to be passed around to others? Hand-selected where as I write others could be righting wrongs in left field.
I pulled a CAH today and it was Claus-themed. I can’t find the statue, but I looked. I imagine out of home and out of park; someone has been trying to cover their bases. Perhaps attacked the holiday or forgot the Holiday Spirit.
I had a relationship once where the person despised Valentine’s Day. Thoughts of forced relationships where very Un-Valentine’s Day approach was to be the way most relationships should work. Others love Halloween. Others 4th of July. Me…St. Patrick’s Day (formerly known as Thanksgiving to myself) while I was in Paris this past year. Sometimes you have to make every holiday special and unique and apply it however you want it to be.
Another thing is to look at why we celebrate holidays. I suppose the Valentine’s Day discussion comes down to the difference between theatrical when it should be about intimacy and opening up daily. AHA moments x3.
The court of opinion goes back to green St. Patrick’s Day in Autumn Mists. Does this apply to “The Peter Principal” or has a frog got my throat. A Greenlight effect that leads to many places of discovery and wonder in foundations and beliefs.
I suppose as one has spent years in positions of either hating or loving, it boils down to what could have been saved and who watched.
I suppose I provide entertainment in acceptance, yet understand maybe some who were misdirected on what happened and what could be gotten away with.
A smacking occurred where noticed or not on unopened presents. Perhaps through window pains there is a relation to forced positions of wealth or where great value to perseverance where even in this regard makes zero sense for sustainability of product and life. Inspiration cut off while hopes, dreams intimacy & civility attacked.
Not smart business moves at all.
The death of a major asset and inspiration…for what? A write your own name approach while power plays to keep things going in exploitation with abuses passed down to others in learned behavior?
I think of the Christmas tree in many symbols. The air freshener of the living room or where breathing space allows. The idea of the Lil’ Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes wondering if a Giant Goliath-sized one could be made as a “Big Bertha” contribution to the Spirit of the holiday tradition that goes in line with my ideas of a Modern Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving (although this is in December). We all have something to be thankful for in gatherings and in lifetime Hallmark moments where, due to time and budget constraints, things sometimes have to be phoned in on sentiment knowing any holiday is personal and has various meanings to them individually. A variety of options there wondering “Who's son has Christmas as their favorite holiday?”
If Christmas was the celebration of the birth of Christ and Easter the celebration (or shock factor) of His return after 3 days of continuing to go about your life like nothing happened and business as usual…where is the moral without understanding the stations (still believe there are 15 of them) and people watching someone slowly die for 13 hours where some wanted to do something about it and others were paid off where elsewhere afterwards, “ Yeah…he totally did this for Us…We are cool…All is forgiven…No Biggie.”
The idea behind the Christmas Tree is a time-honored Tradition where something was cut down and slowly was dying in front of you where, if only we jazz this up a bit people will sit here and love the sacrifice for our own enjoyment.
The irony on cutting down something, watching them suffer and gather annually around it guised as the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ is epic foreshadowing that really makes you understand that perhaps the birthday is really about society and sociology of accepted behavior patterns that may require a revisit in thought. Either way, with every tree purchased annually, you pay for that sin one way or another. Lessons everywhere on the price of power destroying thoughts and transformative notions of the discounted that gets taken over anyways by others to make profit by cutting out the middle men and women.
How does one counter that knowledge is by perhaps having those that cut down trees replant one to be thankful for the message given from a life taken. On the religious side, it opens up on why teachable lessons are flipped all over the place once you discover the inner workings.
When was the first Christmas Tree? I have questions because the Universe is very mysterious on when people didn't get the memo or lesson the first time. The irony of it where always a fan of The Holiday Spirit where once The Jewish Religion find out about this, they will light some candles for you prior. Those who don’t have trees and can’t afford it, I understand. Makeshift Maji means more where handmade and personal while dollar for dollar, some things are priceless. #returnofthemaji
My Christmas wish from long ago to my parents after they were divorced and another mother was introduced to my life. The best Christmas idea ever for a child to get to know their parents. Age 18-19. Or was it 21-22?
What I would like for Christmas is this…
A copy of your favorite book.
Your favorite music album
A version of your favorite movie.
A story of your life.
An art project where you thought of Me (where if others take this on, have it be someone else)
A Carroll somewhere in modern retelling where I successfully incorporated every bit of those gifts and returned it beautifully along with my own submissions in Curated Jellyfish: A Paradise Lost and then some.
-Philip A. Bonneau
6/25/2022 Original posting at 5am EST or was it 3AM or was it lunchtime? Modified slightly from my phone 7/15/2022 and then at public library at 12:40EST
The Santa image is owned by me. It is from my Photo Contributor profile Somamix1 on iStockphoto. It is my childhood Santa statue that brought so much hope and joy to my life and my family. Hyperlinked and free advertising for iStock. I don't suggest others not paying for images for usage.
Editor’s Note: The Christmas idea was probably between 21-22. The original work for food sign was around 12-14 and the sign after my parent’s divorce was any time between 16-17. 11:05am